Hello .

Hye , if you somehow found yourself on my blog , it might of been a misclick or some stupid blogger ad bugging you and you clicked the ad instead of the x button . But nevertheless , if your committed to read my ramblings , your gracious presence at my blog is appreciated . I don't even know why I made this blog . Annnd my internal monologue goes ...

"But Aiman , didn't you make this blog to publicly express your depressive tendencies in an acceptable manner so that people wouldn't accuse you of being total fag about everything ?"

Well it is true , in certain ways I can't explain , 21st century technology has given opportunity for hapless writers as myself to express and elaborate things that are otherwise pretty much f**king insignificant in real life . Somehow I do feel like going on forever and write pointless crap , but thats not why rebooted this rusting excuse of a blog . No , what I really want to talk about is dealing with countless sh*t that happens in our lives , but due to the nature of peers , family and elders these days , none of these growing pains are addressed (hooray for relationships with no emotional support!). And it is so contradicting when these people oftenly , and painstakingly I might add , say

"C'mon man its nothing , shit happens right?"

"Sweetie its probably just stress from school , I don't think its a big deal"

or the ever famous

"Its just feelings"

          

 

God how I wish this all was true ... except its not when you ACTUALLY find yourself staring into blank space for 20 minutes halfway through a meal in your kitchen feeling disappointed for no reason . I guess what I'm trying to say is that talking it out is important (or writing in my sad case). The Malaysian way has always been to shrug off emotional distress , labelling it as

"Kau patut bersyukur kau sihat lagi , tengok budak-budak kat Africa tu , makan sehari pun tak lepas , ape ahh kau ni!"

Well Honorable Judge Jackass-F**khead , having an unhealthy f**ked up mind is probably okay then ? Or is it because most of these people who condescend and judge have never had insecurities , emotional stress or any significant negative impacts on their lives at all ? Go ahead and lace your meaningless prejudice now .
It kinda does piss me off that people act this way , and whats more baffling is that almost everyone I know has never actually gone through any emotional ordeal . Which an Alesana t-shirt wearing , pierced up emo kid would probably proceed to say "Like , nobody gets me" . And it does gets hard living a life with complex suppressed temperament, but I guess getting by could be simple , but then again treading on fragile ice never seems that easy . Anyway , I feel this is a good start up post for any of you reading . It feels good to vent out in writing and I hoped you enjoyed reading . Anyhow , better go back looking for that rare thing that normal people call sleep.

Byes .

(Oh and heres a really awesome live version of Knife Going In by T+S to sign off)